“We all must suffer one of two things: The pain of discipline or the pain of regret.”
Jim Rohn
My niece runs for a Division 1 college in the ACC. Running has been a passion of hers for as long as I can remember. I don’t think there has ever been a time that where she was not running (barring the occasional injury). Either going for a run, in the middle of run or coming back from a run.
I have seen her run in the cold, the rain, the heat. She has run during holidays, while we were on family vacations, early in the morning while we were all sleeping, she was lacing up and out the door.
I’m sure she would have much rather stayed in the nice cozy bed and got a couple extra hours of sleep, but she knew what she needed to do.
She had a goal. To run at the next level. She was embracing the pain of discipline. She knew that if she missed that morning run she would be faced with the pain of regret.
Immediate vs Delayed
Often the pain of discipline is felt immediately but the rewards are delayed. Training countless hours for a race that is months away. You may question why subject yourself to the torture now.
Spending your college experience in the library so you can achieve your career goal, is painful, with the end goal being 4, 6 or even 10 years away. In the meantime your friends may be out partying, enjoying life in the moment.
Conversely the pain of regret trades immediate reward for long term pain. You don’t exercise, so you are faced with health problems down the road. You don’t take your education seriously and have to settle for a job that you just tolerate.
You dream of being an elite athlete, but don’t have the discipline to focus, so you live with the regret of this unfulfilled dream.
How often do we trade an immediate reward for future pain?
Pain of Discipline
The problem is, if you’re like me, you don’t like pain. The longer we can delay pain, the better we feel, in the moment.
Discipline is hard. Discipline requires a clear goal and vision of a future state that is better. This makes the pain worthwhile.
I’m sure on those cold mornings when my niece was out running, while we were all asleep, the goal of running at the next level kept her motivated. It made the pain worthwhile.
The pain of discipline is a good pain, it’s a pain of progress.
Much like after a workout and you’re sore the next day. You know that you did something good.
The pain of discipline is full of promise.
Pain of Regret
We recently went to Tennessee. While we were there we took advantage of the many restaurants in the area. Also, I can’t neglect to mention the deserts as well. You can probably see where this is going.
When I got home and stood on the scale I immediately felt the pain of regret, about 5 pounds of regret staring back at me from the scale.
The pleasure of a good meal is long gone and I’m left with an excess five pounds that I have to put myself through the pain of discipline to remove.
You never asked that person out and now they are dating someone else.
You didn’t apply for the job.
You didn’t apply yourself in high school, college etc.
You didn’t take your health seriously.
You didn’t stop after the third drink.
None of these decisions typically have immediate consequences, so you feel good in the moment. However, the pain of regret is insidious. It creeps in slowly. One month, One year, Five years, Ten Years.
It’s there
It’s sticky.
It’s hard to get rid of
The pain of regret is empty.
Change Your Pain
If you are human you have regret.
All is not lost.
No matter where you are in life it is not too late to change your pain.
Change your focus.
Regret is the pain of looking back, discipline is forward focused.
Give yourself a goal.
Life is different now. Move away from your fixation on the past.
You may never be a D1 athlete, but you can crush your age bracket at the next community 5k.
