Marcus Aurelius
“You don’t have to turn this into something, it doesn’t have to upset you.”
Here is a quick quiz, which one below is different?
Your Favorite Band
Your Favorite Color
The Speed Limit
I hope you said the speed limit.
Why? Because it is an actual rule. The others are personal preferences.
However, in today’s society it seems like people are increasingly trying to make their personal preferences your rules.
Think of how boring life would be if we all liked the same thing?
We would all dress the same, eat the same, worship the same, listen to the same music, read the same books.
I am not a bad person, I just have different preferences.
That is the great thing about being human.
We have choices.
Appearance
We tend to feel that we can judge a person’s values or character by their appearance. The funny thing is there is no universally accepted standard of appearance, it all boils down to someone’s individual background, preference or even cultural differences.
Many years ago, I was asked to usher at a church we were attending. Excited I arrived on Sunday with my best shirt & tie on. One small issue. I wasn’t wearing a sports jacket. I was quickly told that I could not take the offering that day.
What?
I don’t think Jesus would have cared. He probably would have walked on down the aisle in his robe and sandals. Actually, I am not even sure offerings and ushers were a thing back then.
Adam & Eve were naked in the Garden of Eden. You all would probably definitely prefer if I remained clothed. Although I understand that fig leaves are making a comeback
Shorts, jeans, tattoos, nose rings, ear rings, facial hair it doesn’t matter. If you don’t prefer any or all of them that is fine, just don’t judge those that do.
We are all human.
Music
I remember being told once that rock music was dangerous because the rhythm was off tempo from your natural heartbeat which could lead to serious health issues (including but not limited to death).
This also made me extremely paranoid when folks started clapping to a song in church. If Mrs. Jones got off pace she might go down.
Now having the perspective of 20+ years’ experience in cardiology I realize exactly how ludicrous that was. Actually, not eating healthy or being overweight can have some issues for your heart, but not the music you listen to.
Although I have never been brave enough to eat a dozen donuts while listening to Stairway to Heaven or a KISS tune.
Music is a preference.
I don’t like country music, but I like plenty of people who enjoy country music.
What type of music someone likes has no bearing on what type of person they are.
Do you know how many countless hours of Celine Dion & Dixie Chicks I endured while dating my wife?
Guess what I still married her.
I am also proud to say that I still know all the lyrics to “My Heart Will Go On”. I am also more a fan of the later works of Celine, I feel her music evolved to more a modern style, while keeping up with strong lyrics and vocal range. But I digress…
My point is I put up with a different preference when it was convenient for me (getting married).
A Bully Pulpit.
Unfortunately, our society has let individuals take their particular preferences and use these as a bully pulpit to exclude, shame or force people to change.
We want to mandate people to wear what is “right”.
We want people to listen to the “right” music.
The assumption is that you’re an awful human being if your preferences don’t line up with mine.
Actually, you are a normal human being if you don’t like what I like.
That is okay.
Don’t Make it A Thing
Like the quote says, “You don’t have to turn this into something….”
Particularly with a preference.
Don’t make it a thing.
Relationships are too precious
Life is too short to get hung up on minor differences.
In five years, all of our preferences will probably change again.
I might be wearing a toga listening to gangster rap, but I am still me.
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